Sometimes an announcement can make you simultaneously ecstatic and depressed. This was the case when I found out that The Police were getting back together. Their album “Ghost in the Machine” was one of the first albums I got when I joined one of those wretched record clubs. You remember those, don’t you? You paid something like one penny to join, got eight cassettes of your choice, then had to purchase a certain number of cassettes at full price within a designated amount of time. You also specified your favorite music genre, and every month, unless you notified them otherwise, the record club would automatically send you the so-called “album of the month” for that particular genre (at full price, of course).

But I digress. The Police. I was a big fan of The Police, and later on, a big fan of Sting’s, after he went solo. NRG and I attended two of his concerts together – one at the Boston Garden (where I have distinct memories of fighting over the binoculars after our artist removed his shirt during the course of his act), and one at the Saratoga Performing Arts Center. And, I’m sure if I were to dig threw the piles of old t-shirts laying around my parents’ basement, I’d find that black Sting concert t-shirt that I probably spent far too much money on. Do kids even buy concert t-shirts these days?

So, obviously, hearing that my beloved Police were getting back together was indeed exciting. I’ve got a friend who’s going to see them in both NY and Amsterdam. Sadly, I don’t see how I am going to see them. They aren’t performing anywhere that I can get to, so it seems that I will have to give them a miss.

And, you know how you associate a song with a particular person, even though you can’t really remember why? Today’s song is one of those songs. Back in my sometimes-mentioned summer camp days, I had a friend named Beth. I’ve got no idea where she is today or what she’s doing with her life, but to this day, I still associate “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” with Beth. I can still remember how even just hearing the opening notes would send us off into a fit of hysterics, with Beth turning a lovely shade of red (something to do with a crush on a certain counselor, if I remember correctly, but I really can’t be sure). So Beth G, wherever you are, this one’s for you…

Don’t Stand So Close to Me
The Police

Young teacher, the subject of schoolgirl fantasy
She wants him so badly, knows what she wants to be
Inside her there’s longing, this girl’s an open page
Book marking, she’s so close now, this girl is half his age

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

Her friends are so jealous, you know how bad girls get
Sometimes it’s not so easy to be the teacher’s pet
Temptation, frustration, so bad it makes him cry
Wet bus stop, she’s waiting, his car is warm and dry

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

Loose talk in the classroom, to hurt they try and try
Strong words in the staffroom, the accusations fly
It’s no use, he sees her, he starts to shake, he starts to cough
Just like the old man in that book by Nabakov

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

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